Understanding Change

Both parts of this statement were challenging for me to wrap my head around. I'm still working on the first piece...you are not the same person you were a year ago. When you hold on to an identity that brings you comfort, it is hard to let that go. I have 100% been shaped by the person I was many decades ago. I was in a performance career, and everything that comes with that is so defining. I created a persona that enabled me to live my dream, pay my bills, and be part of one of the best communities on the planet. It gave me my purpose in life, my husband, and my very best friends to this day, and though that version of me was pretty awesome! It also provided me with a messed-up body image, the belief that I was only as useful as the mirror dictated, and that I could only bring value in this one role. As you can imagine, when that ride came to an end (hello, children), I was thrown headfirst into a spiral that has lasted many, many years. After lots of very questionable choices and directions, I feel I am finally hitting my stride again, and it is largely because of the above statement. Finally, understanding that the girl I was, a kickass, go-getter that never backed down and lived an amazing piece of my life, no longer exists in that form. She has evolved over and over and over, and every time, it was a valid version of me. Sometimes not, pretty, or what I thought I wanted or particually pleasent at times, but so so necessary. So valid, each time, was where I needed to be, as ugly or painful or boring as I perceived myself to be. I realize I am still all the things I used to take so much pride in, but also so, so much more. In slightly different packaging but no less valid. Embrace every chapter of your story, every version of you, past, present, and future. They are all intentional, all for a reason, and all so unique, which is why you are needed on this planet, right now. No one can bring your story, only you, each version of you.